


why uncle thor is the best storyteller in all nine realms

by girl0nfire



Series: adventures of the soviet superfamily [2]
Category: Marvel, The Avengers - All Fandoms
Genre: Dasha Romanova-Barnes, Domestic Avengers, F/M, Gen, gratuitous Tolkien references, soviet superfamily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-18
Updated: 2012-09-18
Packaged: 2017-11-14 12:03:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/515041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girl0nfire/pseuds/girl0nfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor is a rather enthusiastic storyteller.</p>
            </blockquote>





	why uncle thor is the best storyteller in all nine realms

"And the fair princess did say, 'Unhand me, foul beast!' as she drew her mighty sword."

Here's the thing with Thunder Gods, or at least the one that James has met: they're kind of silly guys.

This theory is one that's been proven over and over. Sharing living quarters with Thor is kind of like sharing a china shop with a very friendly, very blond, very warrior-hearted-and-kind-souled bull. Add in a magic weather-summoning hammer and well, Thor's a pretty interesting roommate.

"'Behold, I am no man,' the fair princess shouted. She threw back her glimmering helm and shook her magnificent golden hair in the wind."

But no matter what kind of shenanigans Thor could get up to on his own, up to and including the time Clint convinced him that tenderizing steaks would be easier with Mjölnir (and it had taken the both of them a week to replace all the broken granite countertops), they were nothing compared to what Thor could get up to with Dasha.  
Which explains why James is currently sitting at the kitchen table, watching his daughter run around wearing Thor’s winged helmet, reenacting the final battle sequence between Éowyn and the King of the Nazgûl from Thor’s favorite “epic tale of Midgardian glory,” _The Lord of the Rings_.

At least Thor hasn’t managed to procure a sword for her.

Yet.

James smiles into his orange juice, remembering when he and Steve had read _The Hobbit_ together for the first time. And once he’d come back to himself, when he and Steve first had a chance to catch up, James wasn’t surprised to go into his room one morning to find a giant stack of books on his nightstand with a note from his best friend saying, “Welcome to the future.”

Natasha had teased them both, but James and Steve were pretty big fans. And James is not too sure who recommended that Thor read them, or who convinced Thor that they were actually “Midgardian history scrolls” (well, that one had Tony’s fingerprints all over it), but once Thor had read them, they’d quickly become one of his favorite things to read to Dasha.

Every few weeks since she’d been old enough to talk, Thor had come to visit Dasha and brought along a copy of the book. Together, they’d worked their way through the first two volumes, and they will soon be finished with the final one, as well. At this rate, Dasha’s going to be the most well-read five-year-old in New York.

“Gathering her remaining strength, the great warrior Éowyn thrust her blade into the death-demon’s blank face, and a piercing screech rang out as his spirit was rent from his body.”

And then, bent on his knees in front of Dasha, Thor clutches his heart and falls to the ground with a dramatic grunt, eliciting a squeal of delight from the small girl, only her chin and two blonde pigtails peeking out from beneath the silver helmet she’s still wearing. 

Hesitantly, Dasha pads toward Thor, who’s lying still with his face buried in the carpet, the book forgotten next to him. She looks to James first, curious, and with an encouraging nod from her father, bends forward to poke Thor’s neck with a chubby finger.

Muffled by the carpet, Thor replies, “Nay, fair warrior, for you have slain me.” 

Rolling over heavily, he retrieves the copy of the book and sits upright, bracing his back against the wall. Dasha rushes to join him, plopping herself down next too him and looking up at his face.

“Would you like me to read you the next chapter of our tale, dear one?”

At her giggly nod, the helmet slips back further on her small head until it slips off completely and lands with a soft _clunk_ on the floor behind her.

“Well then, let us continue on.”

James finishes his orange juice and slips out of the kitchen unnoticed; hopefully, he’ll be able to pry Natasha from the gym long enough to catch another glimpse of the two blond storytellers before at least one of them needs a nap.


End file.
